Misery, my friends, loves company. And that's why when one of us is miserable, we tell another. And when the other hears of our misery, they start off with how the exact same thing has happened to them or to their father's sisters' son's friends Ma-in-law!

What is it that makes us share our misery with other people?Ok...maybe misery is a hard word, but then what is the sorrow or pain - real (headache and sore eyes from crying all night) or imaginary (heartache - come to think of it, the only time my heart aches, i should be beating the door down for the hospital...it would be a heart attack, wouldn't it?) - if not misery?

So, back to what is it that makes us share our misery with others? The need to be heard? The need to be sympathised with (oh poor you!)?The need to have someone tell us - 'oh it's not your fault, it's all external mechanisms that are responsible for your situation. You're only the victim.'?

Now don't think i'm being condescending. I've been there done that. All of what I've said above comes from pure experience. My phone bills are proof of that. One of my best friends lives in one of the country and the other lives in the other corner of the earth. And everytime I'm miserable, I call them up and speak to them, pouring my heart out to them - making them miserable in the bargain if you'd notice. So that's another aspect of "misery loves company" - you share your misery and they're going through the agony of why doesn't (s)he shut up?!?

Strangely though, if you're miserable and I lend you a patient ear and then make some tutting and cooing sounds to soothe you, i'll be called compassionate and caring and understanding.

I should know. I've been recognised for that sort of thing.

So, it's not only company that misery loves. It brings you awards too!

Your melting eyes burn me
Your soft caresses scorch me
Your gentle whispers make me go wild
Your claims on me make me feel like a child
This whole thing is so wonderfully untrue
I've sold my mind and soul to the devil
I've given them to you!

Footsteps...that come and walk away
Without pausing outside my door
Fading away into a yearning
When will it be you?

Everytime they pass my way
My stomach turns a somersault
My heart skips a beat
My hands tremble.

I hold my breath as
Someone comes knocking at my door
I pause on this side of it -
Will it be you?

My insides are knotted
As I wait for you to come
There are no commitments
No spoken attachments.

Yet, i can't help waiting
Or stop anticipating
And the question burns my mind and my heart -
When, WHEN will it be you?

Was it god’s fury this evening that had the winds blowing across so fast or was it the winds trying to forgot some long lost love?

To me it looked like it was just a reflection of the whirlwind inside of me. Thre's so much going on in the deep corners of my heart...and yet, i'm not as lucky as the wids that howl. I stay quiet and I lend a calm, still exterior.

Ah! The vagaries of the human mind and heart.

Of cummings and goings

your little voice
           Over the wires came leaping
and i felt suddenly
dizzy
   With the jostling and shouting of merry flowers
wee skipping high-heeled flames
courtesied before my eyes
                       or twinkling over to my side
Looked up
with impertinently exquisite faces
floating hands were laid upon me
I was whirled and tossed into delicious dancing
up
Up
with the pale important
                     stars and the Humorous
                                           moon
dear girl
How i was crazy how i cried when i heard
                                      over time
and tide and death
leaping
Sweetly
     your voice

...I read this this morning and thought of every single time I waited for some loved one's phone call and when it came, what it did to me. ANd he's summed it up beautifully..."

"...and i felt suddenly
dizzy
   With the jostling and shouting of merry flowers
wee skipping high-heeled flames
courtesied before my eyes"

I remember something turning cartwheels in my tum...I remember the sweet flush on my face,
the trying to speak really slow...

And knowing the feelings were reciprocated...

AAAAAAAAAAAarrrrrrrrrrrrrrggggggggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh....the pain of dealing with self-important ninnies!The torture of getting into meetings with them...the boiling of blood in trying to get a point across...the slumped shoulders in despair of not being able to.

I wonder why me. Do I hear echos and ayes?