Feelings...

Today, for the first time in my life, I was jealous of someone i really like. Actually I'm not too sure if it's jealousy or something else - all I know is that it was a feeling totally new to me and not one i'm particularly proud of.

Which brought me to the kind of people we become as we grow up. The more experience we gain, the more we learn, the worse we become as human beings. I used to love to forever hug my parents and sit and spend time with them. Now, even when I want to hug my parents I don't. When did I change from being the loving daughter that I was to being this angry person who stays closeted in her room and only meets with her parents at dinner or lunch? When did I become this horribly self centered person who can only think about herself and her time to sleep? My father - more than twice my age - get's up abot 2 hours before I do and goes off to sleep about an hour after I'm in zz land. Yet, I behave as if I need more rest. My mother, again more than twice my age, works all day long, yet she's the one who serves me dinner when I come back home from what I call a hard day's work.

Like I said, I'm suddenly not particularly proud of myself or the person I've become.